Diaries of a Post-Grad
Post-Grad. Life after college. “Entering the real world.” This phrase, often uttered by well-meaning neighbors whenever you returned home for breaks during your senior year, always seemed to carry an air of solemnity. As if life was about to hit you like a truck or as if you better take deep breaths now before you wouldn’t have the luxury of doing so once graduating. For as long as I have been hearing it, I have hated that phrase.
As the queen, Mel Robbins, said, it’s the first time in your life that you face the future with no map. Throughout most of our lives, each chapter leads us to the next: elementary school to middle school, middle school to high school, high school to college—and then, well, life after college.
During my senior year, I was fortunate enough to secure a job by February of my second semester, though it wouldn’t begin until July 22nd. With that in mind, I felt ready for the next phase of my life as graduation approached. True to my nature as a planner, I spent months researching where I would live in Atlanta, Georgia, long before I was set to make the move. The excitement I felt for the future was palpable, and I was confident I was headed exactly where I needed to be. Yet, amidst watching post-graduation TikToks about meal prepping for night shifts, I would often pause to remind myself to savor the present moment. Despite my enthusiasm, I knew I would miss the life I was living at that time.
At the time, I was living in my sorority house at the University of Alabama, surrounded by my closest friends just a few doors down. It was just how you would imagine it – Bachelor Mondays all together with all of us sitting on the couches and carpets of our TV room, reminiscing on stories from years before on our twin beds with no knowledge of what our near futures would hold, and knowing what felt like every detail of each others’ lives at the time.
To everyone’s surprise, despite all the people who warned us, time flew. Now, I sit here writing this while my best friends are scattered around the country, all of us sitting in the bedrooms of our own cities trying to make a home away from the people who were home. One minute, you're doing coffee runs three times a week with your best friends, and the next, somehow, three months went by without seeing each other in person.
Life sure did get real.
I miss being surrounded by the people who know me better than I know myself—laughing until our stomachs hurt and having someone check in on me whenever I went MIA during nursing school exams or just needed some alone time. I find that ironic, too, by the way, needing some alone time every so often in college because I would do anything to go back to a time when whispers of girls were heard outside your door 24/7. When being socially drained from the busyness of college was the norm.
Gratitude does not even begin to cover the appreciation I have for the lack of “me time” I had nearly a year ago.
Now, I’m not here to confirm that your sweet old neighbor was right about the dreaded “the real world” we’re supposed to face after graduation. But I am here to say that it can be hard. Ten months into it, I can honestly say I am incredibly thankful for where I’ve landed—and for the friends I’ve met along the way, navigating this new phase of life. My friends and I like to say it feels like we’re freshmen again—new city, new people, new experiences—and honestly, I’m loving every bit of it. Every high and every low.
To be completely transparent, sometimes I’ll be driving to work or cleaning my apartment, and a wave of loneliness will come over me. It doesn’t matter how many people I know are supporting and cheering me on from afar; the feeling still creeps in. Other times, I’ll be walking down The Beltline, passing other girls who look like they’re my age, and I’ll smile to myself and think, This is so cool. That feeling that you are the star of a coming-of-age movie.
I know that everyone’s journey is different, but ten months in, I’m starting to see the beauty in navigating this whole adulting thing on our own. My emotions about post-grad life can fluctuate, and the loneliness sometimes hits, but I know it’s all part of adjusting to a new place and embracing my evolving sense of self. Not many people can say they easily adapt to change. I sure am not one, but I am learning to embrace it, and you will, too.
I remember starting my job back in August and realizing that on my days off, I had nothing I had to do. No homework. No studying. No chapter meetings. No pressure to join clubs I wasn’t truly passionate about. Suddenly, I had freedom—the freedom to start a new hobby, take a spontaneous trip (once the paychecks came through!), or just be. I got this sudden urge to finally join a tennis team of 30-50-year-old women because…well, why not? That spontaneity led me to start this blog, as I realized I had so much to say about the struggles and joys of being a 20-something that often aren’t talked about enough.
During college, I could always find a friend to tag along with me. I never imagined how much time I’d spend on my own after graduation. And while I’m still learning to embrace it fully, it’s been one of the most transformative things I’ve experienced. Being comfortable in my own company, spending time with myself in a way I never had before, has made me feel more at peace with who I am. It’s become one of the most important skills I think anyone can develop in adulthood. I love going to workout classes solo and experimenting with new recipes, just me and Pinterest.
Even though it’s not my current situation, I want to emphasize that moving back home after college and saving money is normal. Many friends have expressed how challenging it is to go from the independence of college life back to living in the room they grew up in. But let me remind you—this time at home with family is fleeting. You may not think you’ll miss it, but you will. So, if you’re in this phase, don’t compare your journey to anyone else’s. Our timelines are all different, and that’s a beautiful thing.
One of the best words I can use to describe the transition out of college is, to put it frankly, weird. It’s just weird. When one of my best friends from college visited me back in October, we walked alongside stunning buildings and took in the liveliness of the city that is Atlanta. She said, I can’t believe you live here. Like, this is your life. I think at that moment, half of my heart broke a bit at the realization of my new reality, feeling more separated than ever from hers and our old college lives. Still, the other half beamed with energy and excitement. Visits from college friends have quickly become my absolute favorite thing. :)
To those of you still in college, I promise that so many bright days and so much growth lie ahead. Yes, life will look a lot different than it does right now, but you will grow and thrive in ways you never imagined. Yes, you are going to soon be reminiscing on the old days with your sweet friends and future bridesmaids. But let me tell you the good news: Life doesn’t end after college.
And to those of you like me—trying to find your place in a world where responsibilities and new cities take center stage—don’t worry. We’ll find our rhythm. It might take time, and it might take a little longer to find our people. But when we look back on this crazy phase of our lives one day, I think we will remember the important things. That is, the way we first began to learn what adulthood looks like and grew through the challenges we faced, how we loved our people (old and new), and the time spent to just ourselves, and how we felt the freedom and hopefulness in having no map for where the compass may be pointing next.